Is it selfish to take care of yourself and seek happiness?

I once stayed on "Mindful Farm" in Thailand. It was run by an ex-monk. While he was a monk, he meditated and lived off food donations & the kindness of others - a seemingly selfish activity. Then, in ~1999, he left the monk life, got married and bought a farm. All seemingly selfish - following a woman he fell for, betraying the brotherhood and gaining money to buy land.

However, the love I felt while on that farm played a huge role in molding me and healing me. It was a place of enormous harmony and peace. He also brought in money from travelers, which allowed him to donate food to his fellow villagers which we all partook in distributing. It is one of the most overwhelmingly positive places I have ever visited.

He grew himself so that he could be of TRUE service to others.

If we do not pay close attention to Spiritual Teachers' words, it can seem like we are being asked to sacrifice our happiness in order to serve others. However, in my experience, a root lesson in life is that - Your happiness SERVES others. https://mindfulfarmers.wixsite.com/thailand?fbclid=IwAR2QLU6CC4c-othm93giSOzCha_dhS1Cth9oSdh4YOIYfe5Ty7ssRwfcYK0